When Will I Really Learn To Cook?

you know when life is good, but something is still missing. when i know what it is, and i no longer want to pay it any attention. and yet it keeps coming up everywhere i go. in conversations, and on tv. especially what seems to come so naturally to everyone else around me. and so i wait, for something to change. not so much wanting to be a cause for the change, but rather expecting the universe to tell me it has. and from time to time, i wake up feeling like something has shifted. i've had a really cheerful week so far and hope comes in profusion. i think i can take things to the next level. and finally have the meaningful change in life i deserve to. i get excited about being seen in a new light, about possibilities leading into new avenues. may be i will finally stop feeling jealous when i am around them. i head towards this new venture with determination. it's finally my turn. it's finally coming around and happening to me. i turn that last corner, ready to get started.

disappointments are a part of life. we all know this. but isn't it just plain wrong when you are no longer surprised? it's really sad, when i know i'm supposed to be sad about the way things turned out, but it actually brings me a smile cause i think it's funny somehow. things usually start out just fine. have every reason to believe it is going to work out. except i never see when i'm already too late. it's already gone bad. i'm not torn up about it. what was i really expecting after so many times? if someone would have told me a few years ago that i would be stuck at this point in life, i would have never believed them.

at the end of it all, i've left only one thing to do. look at it one last time for now. i know that it's what is still missing. i turn around, smile and walk away. i did everything i could. and now i can't stop thinking about ...

St. Patrick's Day

A couple month's late posting this, but nevertheless ...

Went to Savannah for a weekend with a bunch of friends for St. Patrick's Day.

The place was awesome. Tons of people showed up from everywhere proud of their Irish background. Apparently Savannah is Irish Central for St. Patty's. So I was glad to be there to enjoy the parade and take part in the general festivities of being green and getting drunk.

The trip was a disaster for me. I thought I was going with a bunch of singles planning on getting wasted. The moment we get there, everyone decides to come out with their "new" relationship. Apparently everyone in the group had paired up and I was the only loser (and one other guy who couldn't take it anymore and left before the weekend ended) who was single and had absolutely no clue. Yeah, I do NOT recommend getting stuck in another city with no transportation with a bunch of PDA-inflicted new couples. I wanted to kill myself.